Kate Conference

Kansas Association of Teachers of English 2017

This was my first time attending KATE or even any kind of professional conference so I walked into the weekend not knowing what to expect. As I review my notes over the weekend, I think what sticks out the most to me is the love for literature that those teachers had. Don’t get me wrong, I love to read and I have my favorite authors, however, when I won a book by Agathe Christie as a door prize and I didn’t know who she was- my fellow Core 3 classmates were shocked. Apparently, I have some reading to catch up on!

On Friday, I was not able to attend very many of the Breakout Sessions due to outside schedules; on Saturday, though, I heard a Breakout Session that really spoke to me. First, a few facts about me: I am a perfectionist, I beat myself up (mentally) when I can’t achieve perfection, especially in my schooling, and I struggle to not put myself in a pre-designed box and then beat myself up when I don’t fit. It’s all very unhealthy in an attempt to look perfect. I get that from my mother so let’s collectively blame her. So, on Saturday, after a small meltdown before 8 am, I decided to go to the Breakout Session by Brooke Johnson called Finding Balance by Letting Go.

In an hour-long session, most of which was spent laughing, Brooke Johnson talked about her meltdown in the classroom, being diagnosed with anxiety and depression, and eventually finding a way to make teaching manageable through slash identities and permission slips. Johnson got these foundations from the author Brene Brown. A slash identity is basically writing down everything that you do to fill time in your life and everything that you want to do (ex. Teacher/student/runner) so that if one area of your life starts to fade, your whole identity doesn’t fade with it. I found this especially important as I look out on my first year of teaching- it seems so easy to give my life away to everything that goes into teaching and very quickly end up burned out and having a meltdown during 7^th hour. Having different parts of your life that you dedicate time to and that fulfill your soul makes balance in your life so much easier- getting up from the desk and leaving the school at a reasonable hour is easier when you have a life outside of the double doors. For the past two days I’ve started writing down everything in my life that I consider a part of my identity as well as other areas I’d like to explore so that I can find ways to fulfill my life outside of teaching; I want teaching to be the icing on the cake of life.

Permission slips, the second part of this session, are going to be a life saver- I can already tell. Basically, you write a permission slip for yourself regarding anything in life: permission to leave the school early, permission to close your classroom door during lunch, permission to decline the invitation to that shower, permission to let yourself off the hook for turning that assignment in late, etc.… As I wrote out a few permission slips for myself, I realized that it rubbed my perfectionist self raw but that was exactly what I need: permission to not be perfect.

I walked out of that Breakout Session feeling motivated to develop healthier mental habits in my life, especially my teaching life. I have had numerous veteran teachers tell me that the turnover rate for new teachers rises every year because of all that is expected of a teacher: the teaching and the paperwork and the planning and the support and anything else that gets added before I graduate. I would like very much to not be included in the turnover rate and I have a great Mentor Teacher who is using this last year of my college to slowly introduce me to all aspects of teaching and letting me try my hand at small chunks of planning/grading/parent meetings/etc. so that when I walk into my own classroom, I am more prepared. However, I want to be prepared to take care of myself mentally and physically as well, so that as each new school year rolls around I am there in my classroom greeting students.

There were so many other great things about the KATE conference and each Breakout Session offered something to feed the mind- I wrote on the Breakout Session affected me most immediately; I felt that I needed to hear that Session on that day and before I melt under the stress of Core 3- I give myself permission to take a break and take a walk.